Yesterdays Pictures Are Old News

im bored and kinda cant sleep(cuz ive been sleeping all day) but yea, so i went to sonnys myspace, its lik myspace.com/sonnysound and yea....he doesnt do so great without the band backing him up, i mean yea its its same good voice but its different music wich he classifies as 'pop/electronica/alternative' ick. so yea, i dont think he's gonna get very far haha stupid ho. ho bag ho ho ho. blaklla;ksjf;ldkajfaklsdjfa;slkjf

k so im oober sick right now and yesterday i was too(and kinda sunday) but im getting a lil better from yesterday and i'll probably be better for sure by thursday(i better be so i can go see mcr!) so yea, grr even tho right now i dont have a huge fever my throat hurts really bad, you dont even know. gr. i hate being sick. gr i also hate that sonny moore, that lil bitch, is quitting fftl, how could he. i also hate jared leto's facial hair...seriously he needs to shave alot. so now i suppose it would be time for me to go since im not supposed to be on the computer in the first place.

okay these are two dreams i've had the last few nights

Im walking to a road past the side of the dentists office(wich i actually did the other day for real) and it was me erica and ricky, we get to the main road and then to the place to cross by walgreens etc. and we start walking across and ricky asks me a question i dont know what it is but i explained somthing and he got really mad and stopped talking to me and then we got to the bookstore and i said "why wont you talk to me?" and he ignored me and we werent supposed to be in the bookstore we were supposed to be at a huge party at the highschool but we werent i dont know why, but the bookstore was decorated for halloween and christmas kinda and his gf showed up and they both were just kind of staring at me and i dont know where erica was or what she was doing but there were a bunch of other people in there talking loudly and it was really crowded and that was basically it.

 

a bunch of stuff happens that i cant remember and then me and this girl(i dont know who) are put in this giant pit type thing and a guy comes and says that we have to take these poisenous pills but if we eat somthing every few hours we will live and he throws in a bag of sour patch kids. so he forces us to take the pills and he leaves and we kinda each have a sour patch kid every hour(or what we think has been an hour, we dont have watches) and we're both kinda panicky but trying to keep calm and every day for 3 days he comes and gives us the pills than on the 5th day he comes and says they're going to kill us anyway(i dont know who they is) so he lets us out and brings us somewhere else and says we have one day left to ourselves to be free but to watch out and the next morning, like around 3 prbly when i know they're coming i start running and the girl was telling me not to that they would catch me and it would be even worse. i run anyway and it looks lik this road by my grandparents old house up north and im running and i keep tripping cuz somthing is wrong with my leg and eventually i get to this bathroom(looks lik the one at riverside park) and its really small and round kinda and i get in and i have this orange marker and people are running after me trying to kill me and im screaming "NO I JUST NEED TO SAY GOODBYE, I NEED TO SAY IM SORRY, JUST WAIT!!!!" and they were kinda far behind and i grab an orange white board marker and there was a huge white board on the wall and i start writing a ton of things such as i'm sorry, this wasnt supposed to happen, il miss you, its better this way, i screwed up, goodbye, im so sorry and stuff like that and ive almost filled up the entire board when they come in and try to take me away and i scream again "JUST LET ME FINISH" and they do and they watch me all in a circle around me so i cant escape but when i finsish i fall to the ground and start crying even more and they say "you survived on your own so we'll let you live but this is your last chance" so they let me go but my whole family and all my friends think im dead and i go and suprise each member of my family and dont really know what happened but when i suprise them theyre not at their houses their at the lady i babysit for's house and i have to go down the hill to the water to say im sorry for what happened and that i love them.  then i go to school and there's a huge assembly or somthing, no its more like a lock down or somthing i dont know but not really and the whole schools in the middle school gym on the ground in rows and  theres people that dont even go to our school and i have to walk through all these rows of people to get to my friends but i cant find them and when i do i just find libby so i sit down next to her and all these people are looking at me like im crazy, and i kind of see the rest of my friends but they ignore me, and im lik "you guys, im okay, i survived" and they just give me a bored plain look lik who cares and then on the announcments i hear that epiphanies has arrived and candice runs over and shes like "come on, lets go get them" so we walk to get them but its from like the area where we hang out in activity period to the cancoon, and i asked if she had anything in it and she said no but she couldnt wait to see them and we got there and it was really thick instead of really thin like the other two and i look at the back to see the price and its $18.00 american money and $15.99 canadian, wich is wierd cuz usually it would be the other way around and not that expenive anyway, theyre like $3 in real life and i dont have any money so candice buys it for me and we walk back but its lik in the mall and i keep telling people that im alive that i almost died but im okay and nobody cares and yea...it was really weird.

"I brought you all here to discuss as i must...."

Ok Go - Ok Go....cant stop listening to it....i havent listened to this cd since the beginning of the year and before that i dont even know when. i know i listened to it earlier this year because i wrote a short story(wich will be appearing in epiphanies) after the song Shortly Before the End, wich for a while had a skip in it but i fixed it by kicking my cd player repeativly and then waiting for it to skip itself out and wow it actually worked woot. so yes. okgo has been my main music priority for the last few days, but only the first cd, i dont even know when i last listened to Oh No and i dont personally haf a strong desire to at the time. i am however intrested in hearing what they are going to put out next, a while ago they said they were recording but who knows with them, they were prbly just dancing their asses off. yea, my stupid jugglers club account still wont send my my password and its really really annoying me cuz i want to log on ther :( yes.

ach i forgot how great these guys were....this reminds me sooo much of the summer between 8th and 9th grade he he he he he he.....yay, i luv em tho, i really do, and the whole beginning of highschool which was a great time, the middle eh and the very end was wootness but like...the year so far woah, prbly the best friends/socially so far, self-ly eh..not really but dooode...ok go...yay. haha i'll actually prbly listen to oh no after this just for the hell of it, for OH LATELY ITS SOOO QUIET IN THIS PLACE...even tho its sung quietly i write it loudly yay hahahaha....yes, oohh and invincible and televisiontelevision ohhh yay i luv em i do i do i do, i really want to go see them again with silversun pickups who i really really want to see too ahh yes....yes.

""Bye bye baby"  Sybal says as she walks out the door, you can bet that hollywood looks oh so good much better than it ever has before..."

okay its pretty much my first fan fic and its one of those ones thats just one part so yea, andi wanted a fan fic that was nice to joe. here it goes

 

    Once upon a time Fall Out Boy stopped at a little tiny mini golf course that had a small arcade and go kart track on the grounds.  It was in a small quiet town and this was the main place of entertainment for the local kids, the closest mall was a 2 hour drive away and there wasnt much to do besides hang out there.  Theyre van stopped outside and the four of them piled out follwed by Dirty, William Beckett, and Gabe Saporta.  Like mentioned previously this town had nothing, however it was home to the largest stuffed animal machine in the world(you know the ones that you use the claw to pick up stuffed animals and only can sometimes win) it was huge!  As Joe saw it his eyes lit up in happiness and excitment, he put his hands to his face and squealed like a fob fangirl "AHH I NEED TO WIN ONE!!!!" staring at a fluffy pink frog with its googly eyes pressed against the glass window, it was calling him. the woman who was working at the prize table came over to him, the rest of the guys were seated at a small table in the cafe area relaxing, "I see you have your eyes on the pink frog" she said sweetly smiling at him.  He stopped staring at the frog to look at the girl.  She had short blond hair with a single blue streak on her bangs, the streak matched her enticing, mezmorizing blue eyes that were gazing up at him.

"uh...yea" he said almost speechless

"everyone who tries to get it has failed, everyone has left dissapointed, do you think you can beat em?"

"i can try" he responded confidently, now they were both staring at the frog, "Have you ever tried" he asked

"no"

"why not"

"becuase i would win it and i would rather have someone who really wanted it to have it, i want to see you win it" she said mysteriously

"well then i guess i will have to" he said, he reached into his pockets and pulled out some quarters to start playing.  He tried 17 times with no luck before he heard Pete call,

"Hey Joe, go karts, Now!" as his friends were heading out the door to go a few rounds on the go kart track

"i'll be out in a second, i must win this frog" he called back

"we cant leave you alone, some crazy teenie will kidnap you, come on" Patrick said trying to convince him to come with them

"I'll take care of him" the girl said, standing next to joe watching him try and win his prize

"I dont want you to be alone dude, you know im not a trusting person"

SHIT MY OKGO CD HAS A HUGE SKIP IN IT...sorry im listening to that as i type this

"I'll stay back with him" William suggested

"Fine, make sure he doesnt make any lil baby troh's either, we dont need MORE babies keeping ppl off tour" pete said glaring at Dirty "whore" he muttered to him under his breath

"Dude! cmon....he has part of ur name that makes us even" Dirty responded trying to sound innocent, they left and william walked over to the machine and stood there watching joe continously trying to win the frog.  He was definetly the third wheel seeing as the only things joe and the girl would look at were eachother and the game.

"I'm going to get somthing to drink, want a soda" she asked joe, ignoring william who was lookin hurt in the corner

"yea sure, im out of quarters so im gonna go get some more" he said walking to a machine to change cash into change and she went to the prize table to get drinks.  William was sick of their stupid games, he shouldnt have stayed behind for joe, he wanted some attention and he wasnt getting any, oh if only he had his laptop with him he could go on buzznet and read all the fanfics and comments about him saying how great he was, he didnt though and he really wanted attention.  he began scheming for a way to make them notice him, he rememberd a story in the news a while back from when a child had crawled into one of the machines and gotten stuck. no doubt he was skinnier than this kid, plus this was a giant machine filled with stuffed animals, he couldnt hold himself back as he began climbing into the machine.  it was a little difficult was there were a lot of sharp corners but he made his way up and pushed thru layers of colorful fluffy prizes to the top, he peaked his head out, joe and the girl were walking back to the machine, flirting with eachother.  William looked and saw the pink frog, the frog on joes dreams laying their right in front of him, it looked even more amazing up close, he was suddenly overcome with the urge to take the frog and push it to the very bottom so joe would have no hope of winning it and him and his stupid girlfiend could just makeout or somthing,

"where did your friend go?" the girl giggled noticing william was not there, he was suprised they even realized he was gone

joe looked around and spotted his head sticking out right by his frog, his eyes practically popped out of his head as he pointed to william in disbelief, "what the hell are you doin?!??!" he shouted

"you and your friend were ignoring me so i made a bunch of my own fluffy friends!" william shouted through the glass

"get out of there!"

"No!"

"Im gonna go get the guys" joe said to the girl has he ran out the door, while he was outside she tried persuading William to get out, all the guys ran inside and as soon as they saw william dirty and gabe were on the floor laughing.  pete was pissed, patrick and andy were amused and confused

"get out RIGHT NOW!" pete yelled, "were leaving now!, Joe look what you did, we're gonna be late for the show tomarrow and its all your fault"

"my fault?!?!?!!?" we werent even gonna leave for lik 7 more hours, how the hell does that make us late?"

"you just...theres gonna be a hoard of paparrazi and stuff and wer never gonna get out of here." pete explained angrily

"oh fuck you pete" joe replied

"shut up you guys, its no big deal" patrick said looking down, they both ignored patrick and pete held his evil glare with joe

"its better not to get involved" andy whispered to patrick, he knew not to go against anything pete said, that never turned out good, gabe and dirty were trying to stop laughing as they lay on the floor gasping for air.  Inside the machine william started to cry, the attention wasnt on him it was on joe, and he didnt want anyone to fight and now they were, he hated wen pete was upset." he grabbed the pink frog and slid out of the prize machine slowly as pete and joe were arguing.  he got out and stood up, handing the frog to joe,

"sorry everyone" he said looking down, "i didnt want u guys to get mad"

"its okay" pete said finally calming down, he was just pissed that joe was gettin the girl for once instead of him.  "we really should go though" he said, the rest of the guys agreed and headed for the door, joe stayed behind for a moment, the girl looked at him

"youre leaving arent you" she said quietly

"yea, i have to"

"i'll miss you" she said

"me too," he replied, "and i dont want to miss you, do you want to finish the rest of the tour with us?"

"of course i do!" she said excitidly

"yay!" he said happily as they kissed eachother, grabbed hands and ran out the door. 

from that day on joe dated the girl who he later found outs name was Summer and she never had to return to the boring town and he got to keep his fluffy pink frog of love and they all lived happily ever after (but joe was the happiest <3)

im so excited and like talking about it woot.

My Chemical Romance(march 1st):with rise against and muse. wooty woot!!!!!!! mcr is my favorite so yay...its going to own, plus i get to miss the next day of school cuz we be chillin in chicago afterwords yayayayyayayayay...yay.

Taste of Chaos(March 17): totally there for 30stm, then chiodos, then the used, the other bands i dont really listen to but yay. its st patricks day(and it would have been my grandpas bday) yay i cant wait wait wait. ooaslkfdj;alskjfdl;askjf yes. still need to figure out all the ride giving situation and the whos going situation.

And Then I Turned Jamestown Story(march 29): WOOOOO! ther coming right back to my lil itty bitty town to play at that lil itty bitty church again and i cant wait becuase i luv them and yayness...yes.

I'm torn between...

Cobra Starship(march 9th): actually its a cartel one but i would go for cobra and boys like girls and kinda cartel, i would go becuz one of my friends wants to and its cheep for good bands

and...

Snow Patrol(april 5th i thnk): i dont give a fuck about the snow patrol but i do lik silversun pickups and i do love okgo even if they are sellouts and im mad at them, but i would like to see them agian and see whats going on since last february with them be lik 'hey yo, what thehell are you doing hoes".....yea..i would totally do that, again tho it is more expensive than cobra, but still, the main band isnt great, hmmm...

so: turns out i will be seeing cobra starship again if i go to fall out boy wich i most likely will be going to that, and boys like girls, im not actually a huge fan, just a fan so i wouldnt die if i missed them

conclusion: OKGO AND SILVERSUN PICKUPS IT IS! woot.

Honda Civic Tour(wut is it, may 17th?): def. for fob, +44, the academy is..., and cobra starship, but who the fuck is paul wall and why the hell is going to be taking up my precious time and filling my ears with shit?

there you go. just so u no my schedule and want to stalk me or anything, haha if u do i'll kill you, im a trained snipper betch.

k so a while ago i was lookin thru old notebooks

today i was lookin thru old yearbooks

and i just looked at my poem notebook from earlier this year that i recently filled up and i look back and half the poems i thought wer really good, arent too great and half the poems i hated are actually pretty good. its complicated. i hate all the thoughts of the poems i really really really really do and its lik galksjhfd;laksjf stupid as;oifdja;slkjfa;slkjfd. they mean alot to me but theyre so meaningless becuase no one but me really sees them besides the few i had posted on buzznet but removed and my mom has read a few and hated them.

i wish someone could/would just take the notebook and read them all and i wouldnt have to explain a thing and they would just know all of the thoughts that i had/have and stuff so it could seem lik ther was actually a purpose for me writing them.

i also look at at them and think 'damn, i got a new notebook and i hafnt written much in it' i dont know why, ive prbly just used up all my creativity and lines of emotion and truth or maybe im just getting lazy

So long live the fuck face farts, looooong live the fuck face faaaarrttsss!!!!!!!!!!(to the same lil tune as long live the car crash hearts) dnt wrry i luv fob im just bored bored bored al;djf;lasjfda;ljfd;laerjfpoiweaufljflkasjf;laksjfdl

really...really...bored

scrubs was really really good today, it was pretty sweet pretty awesome ya no. that website tho, thetoddtime.com it doesnt wrk they are a FAKER they are a FRAUD theyre living a lie theyre living a lie their life is livng a LIE they dont impress me they dont intimidate me ...

bored ha.

garblesnit i feel lik doin somthin. too bad.

pft too bad i duno the password to my jugglers club account and ther are a few things on ther to make points and there like never are any more. pft okgo are bitches.

so im listening to some interview with patrick and andy and ther talkin bout some of the songs and patrick was talkin bout wut this song reminded him of and he said lik a quiet summer night with a possible slightly romantic experiance and some otherstuff about it being really innocent and stuff and dude...when i first heard that song i thought pretty much the same thing

it reminds me of walkin round doin nothing and just hanging out with friends in the begginning of the year just talking and stuff.

just saying. great irish minds think alike ha.

if i were to describe my life a few years ago, maybe the last 5 years i would prbly say it was pretty good with a few flaws until this summer. i found 2 old diaries from 7th grade to beginning/middle of 9th grade and i guess im wrong. i look back and reading them theyre filled with alot of angry and hateful stuff. thers practically a suicide note in one, one from a time in 7th grade that i cant even remember, how couldnt i remember somthin lik that? thers stuff about huge fights with my best friends. i look at this stuff and see what has happened because of my actions and its weird....i still worry about some of the same things(the way i look/weigh...dude 7th grade i was freaking out about it)   but than at the same time i look back at it and laugh because was i ever stupider...i mean...wow...some of it....i duno hahahahha....what my stupid sheltered self wrote on dec 15 2005

"im sorta becming punk rock which i thinkg scares and pisses off cassi but im making new friends like heidi and iris and ricky"

the punk rock part makes me giggle....seeing as sposedly im a 'pop punk rebel' as nikki has recently described it :) wow.....its wierd...i guess i got a hair cut in 7th grade that i dont remember and i haf a chunk of hair in there...its really shiny and clean...? what.

wow.....this is too wierd....stuff from the day my cousin died and we didnt know who did it....and then a few hours later when we did find out...wow.....

on a diff note of them they are filled with random guys names. one part...okay lik a jillion pages in one from the summer between 7th and 8th grade was filled with some guys mikes name...it took me forever to figure out who mike was...some guy that i met once..wow...well...

blast from the past. i dont write in diaries or journals anymore...well i had one over this summer and a skosh in the begginning of the year but its more of....not good stuff and im not gonna look at it ever. well...not for a long looong loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time

old journals make sad memories and happy tears.

nobody knows her

they see her

talk to her

smile with her

and she lies to them all

all the time

and she has never let them see herself

few times she has slightly revealed herself

fewer times it has helped

and she doesnt know why

all she knows is that she is grateful

for each and every thing they do

whether small or huge

pointless or helpful

she would thank them forever

but she doesnt know how

she knows no way to show them how much she cares back

and she wishes she could help them and be as great a friend to them as they are to her

and she wishes she could tell them everything

everything thats gone wrong

and everything that makes her smile

(even if nobody even noticed how awesome it was, so awesome that it made her day)

and they're the reason she doesnt leave.

1

11

21

1211

111221

312211

13112221

1113213211

what comes next in the pattern?

 

wow.....im bored. al;kjfoi;wejboredboredboredlkasjfdopwiekjflaskjfowe

YOU ARE A FAKER admit it YOU ARE A FRAUD admit it

BORED

im in a really indie/slower/quieter music type of mood today. iv listened to like...blue october, deathcab for cutie, plain white tee's, jacks manniquin, and jamestown story.....just saying.

do u no wut comes next in that pattern in the beginning. i do.

"In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind "

-Blue October

these words are what im thinking bout, not the song but the words themselves. thanking someone. i duno y im thinking of it now.